hartselle
A company, feeling it was time for a shake-up, hires a new CEO. This new boss is determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the facilities, the CEO notices a guy leaning on a wall. The room is full of workers and he thinks this is his chance to show everyone he means business!
The CEO walks up to the guy and asks, "And how much money do you make a week?"
Undaunted, the young fellow looks at him and replies, "I make $200.00 a week. Why?"
The CEO then hands the guy $200 in cash and screams, "Here's a week's pay, now GET OUT and don't come back!"
Feeling pretty good about his first firing, the CEO looks around the room and asks, "Does anyone want to tell me what that slacker did here?"
With a sheepish grin, one of the other workers mutters, "He's the pizza delivery guy."
christianpaintings
Mildred, the church gossip and self-appointed arbiter of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose in the other members' private lives. Church members were unappreciative of her activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.
She made a mistake, however, when she accused George, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his pickup truck parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon.
She commented to George and others that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing.
George, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just walked away. He didn't explain, defend, or deny; he said nothing.
Later that evening, George quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred's house... and left it there all night!
jmlcorb
is acupuncture a cultic practice?
evolution18
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible. -- George Burns
An experienced preacher concluded his sermon by saying ... If I were asked to drink all the Scotch, whiskey, and wine in this world, I'll throw them in the river. Immediately choir master stood up and said, for our closing song let's sing "We shall wait by the river side"
The pastor happily told his congregation about the church's new public address system. He explained that the microphone and wiring were paid for with church funds. Then he added, "The loudspeaker was donated by a member of our congregation in memory of his wife."
trinityf
'Feed the Children' ministry fired two of its own accountants after they reported potential fraud or illegalities to the ministry's board. As a result, MinistryWatch.com has issued a donor alert which in part says:
'It is clear that this is a ministry that is still struggling with acting in an upright manner, even after its recent court-mandated governance overhaul. Donors who have contributed over $1 billion to Feed the Children should prayerfully consider redirecting their donations to other similar Christian ministries that have a history of operating with integrity, efficiency and transparency.'
christianpaintings
Feed the Children has a history of controversy and accounting concerns, including the revelation that a former CFO once falsified the ministry's audited financial statements over the course of two years. Also in the last year, an employee of its South African subsidiary has been accused of embezzling $100,000 and it was also suggested in internal memos that Larry Jones own son has had work performed on his home with ministry funds and had a ministry credit card even though he was not a ministry employee.
